Column: Every Day is a Winding Road

(Editor's note: This is the next installment in a regular feature by South Lake Tahoe-based Certified Wellness Coach and Advanced Integrative Therapist Krista Kline. Visit her website at www.kristaekline.com.)

For the past few weeks I have started and stopped writing this column. I've had some real inspiration, awoken with “brilliant” ideas in the middle of the night only to sit down, start writing and get absolutely nowhere. My virtual trashcan seemed to be getting full while the ideas seemed empty.

So this week I decided to toss the map out that kept leading me from one detour to the next and allowed intuition to provide me with some clarity in the direction I wanted to go. I find that when I am hell bent on sticking to a particular thing, when I am holding on for dear life to an idea, a plan or even a person, that’s when I get really stuck. And then I ask myself, what am I holding onto? This is usually just moments before I finally let go and get into the flow of where I need to be.

Every Day is a Winding Road
I get a little bit closer
Every day is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feelin’ fine
- Sheryl Crow

The truth is, I’ve had some personal speed bumps and roadblocks over the last few weeks that have left me feeling less than motivated. Does that ever happen to you? Do you ever feel like the road you’re on just keeps turning and turning and suddenly you find yourself right back where you started? Or even worse, you travel for miles thinking you’re heading in the right direction, only to run out of gas in the middle of nowhere and wondering how you got so far off your intended track? As my girl Sheryl so beautifully states, “Everyday is a winding road.” And boy is it. The question is, how do we handle the turns?

What I’ve come to know in this crazy thing we call life is that the winding road we’re all speeding down can really surprise you. And that doesn’t always feel like a good thing. I mean, I love surprises (you know like a call or a note from an old friend or finding a 5 dollar bill in the street) but so many times, we get surprised, even shocked by life’s not so pleasant events. The death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, a debilitating disease or injury, a failed business or personal goal — all can completely throw us into a tailspin and leave us disoriented and overwhelmed.

These events in and of themselves, although unpleasant or even devastating, are not the issue. Like it or not, these things are just part of being human. Feeling sad, angry, frustrated or confused about unexpected changes are normal. It is our right to honor those feelings. The issue I’m finding for many of us are that we judge or even try to stop the feelings we’re having. We try to make ourselves feel better as quickly as possible without getting in touch with the actual feelings we’re experiencing. The ups and downs of life are normal. Trying to control or numb the feelings are not. So many times we suffer harder and longer than necessary simply because we believe we “shouldn’t” be feeling so sad, or we “should” just get over it already.

What I’m learning, is that if we can accept that there will be turns and there will be challenges as a result, (rather than trying to get through life as if we were going from point A to point Z in an unrealistic straight line) then perhaps we can more easily maneuver and, dare I say, flow rather than resist the sometimes unexplained events that affect us all.

The road ahead for each of us is unclear. Each day we wake up there is no knowing what may happen. Today may be extraordinary, we may experience love, laughter and complete joy or perhaps this day will bring tears, sadness, chaos and loss. Of course we hope that we have more joy than pain, more laughter than tears. But sometimes we don’t.

It is important to recognize that even though some of the turns in our life take us through incredible darkness, around the next corner is brilliant light and life. Things are ever changing. Find acceptance in this truth and perhaps these turns won’t seem so treacherous.

Two weeks ago I felt stuck and tried to force something to move that wasn’t ready. Last week I felt sad and overwhelmed by some unexpected news. This week I am back in the flow, moving a little easier and watching spring come to life. Today I am soaking up the sun, watching flowers bloom, listening to the birds and finding gratitude in the little things.

Life is amazing like that and I’m getting a little bit closer to feeling fine. And you can too if you just remember to enjoy the ride...detours and all.

— Writer Krista Kline is a Certified Wellness Coach and Advanced Integrative Therapist. Her mission and passion is to assist individuals in realizing their goals and dreams by clearing away the obstacles that are keeping them stuck. Her unique combination of wellness coaching and AIT helps her clients increase self-esteem, improve relationships, reduce anxiety and fear, transform self-sabotaging beliefs and attain balance and peace. Call (530) 400-6670 now for a free consultation. Visit her website here.
Follow Krista Kline on South Tahoe Now:

— March 22, 2012: Column: I’ve got a feeling, I’m not the only one

— March 5, 2012 Column: A Change Will Do You Good

— Feb. 21, 2012 Column: Getting Clear on The Life You Want

— Feb. 14, 2012 Column: Falling in Love All Over Again